Red
July 18, 2011
It’s very rare that a song will make me shed tears.
This one in particular hit the tear duds nerve going into the first minute of the song.
This song really reminds me of someone;
That someone is…
Me.
I think I am just feeling sorry for myself. Head will explode soon from all the things going through my mind. And the weather is not helping either.
I digress…
Basically there is a crisis going on in my head.
So what’s a girl to do?
The damsel-in-distress in me is telling me to curl up in a fetal position and cry it out and maybe, JUST maybe things will get better.
The strong-headed-tough-bitch in me is telling me to buck up and face reality. Nothing is going to be solved by doing nothing. I have to fight for what I want because no one, NO ONE is going to just give it to me.
But what if I’m tired of fighting for something that seems to be drifting further and further away? And what if I’m tired of crying it out?
What if there is nothing I can do about anything?
I’m tired, tired of trying since nothing I’ve tried works.
The least complicated thing of this whole situation is that I’m simply, just simply….exhausted of it all.
The beast
July 17, 2011
A lonely beast treks through the woods,
Causing havoc wherever it stood.
The animals hide in fright,
Afraid that the beast will strike.
At night its eyes; bright and red
It almost seems there are horns on its head.
As ugly as this beast may seem,
All it wants is to redeem.
To redeem its long awaited path,
When will this beast be good enough?
This beast is often misunderstood,
For it is often influenced by its mood.
Creating fear
Causing tears
If only this beast can ever be tamed.
Greetings
July 16, 2011
Hello blog,
I’m sorry I’ve neglected you for a long time. With work and everything, I really don’t have a lot of time to pen down my thoughts. Perhaps that explains why I’ve been feeling a lot of things, most of which are just unexplainable.
I think I’ll start blogging again. I need an outlet to express the many emotions that are going through my mind these days. To sum up, I just feel lost. It’s quite a helpless feeling and I don’t it at all.
I have my good days, and I have my bad days. Maybe blogging again will help me put things into perspective. Maybe it’ll show me the right path to take once I put everything in writing.
I will post soon, I promise.
Signed,
Me
Sadness
February 27, 2011
After three blissful months, Rob has left Kuching.
Something tells me I would probably start blogging again. I need to get my writing mojo back.
Will write soon dear readers (the 2-3 of you who keep coming back).
XXXOOO
The million dollar question
September 20, 2010
Something short from me before my raging womanly curse flares up with a vengance again.
This is too funny not to share.
Today in class I touched on commodities and gave some examples such as “petroleum, natural gas, rice, sugar” etc.
As I summed up what I talked about in class, I asked the class if they had any questions.
One boy, with this really serious yet innocent look on his face raised his hand and asked “Miss, is natural gas….like….farts?”
The whole class erupted in laughter and I stood there in disbelief. I mean, he didn’t at all look like he was being sarcastic or a smartass. He truly seemed like he didn’t know what natural gas was. And if indeed he was being a complete smartass, he deserved an Emmy award!
At that precise moment, I was not sure whether to laugh or cry! Here was a boy in his early 20s and had no clue what natural gas is?Â
Part of me wanted to be a complete smartass and say something like “Oh yes, you should fart in jars and sell em. You would make a killing!” but judging by the look on his face, I simply exclaimed “No that’s not natural gas!” to which the entire class erupted in laughter once again.
“Then what is natural gas?” he asked.
“The contents in those Petronas or Shell gas cylinders are a form natural gas,” I explained.
As soon as I finished that sentence and in my efforts to refrain from turning his question into a 15-minute comedy skit, I finished off class by saying “Okay, that’s it for today. I will see you on Wednesday.”
HELLO WORLD!
September 17, 2010
I’m not sure why but I have this intense urge to blog today after disapprearing for the “Blogsphere” for quite some time. (Granted my previous turd post was a copy-paste from my Facebook Notes. *hangs head in shame*)
Currently, I’m typing this at work. Oh yes, a little update on my life now.
I resigned my job as a reporter with the local daily for a job as a *drumroll please* lecturer (or instructor or teacher, however you want to see it but I’m still finding it weird calling myself a “lecturer”) in a local institution of higher learning.Â
The hours are golden compared to my previous job and the pay is better. In fact, quite a lot better in my humble opinion.
I sincerely miss my job as a reporter. To be exact, I miss the writing part the most. At times, when I think back at the hours and amount of stress that came with it, I’m glad I took this current job. More often than not, I still find myself missing my co-workers who have become good friends even though I’ve known them for under a year.
However, I am not saying my current job is completely stress-free. It’s just a different type of stress altogether and working in an environment that lacks some comprehensive facilities can be quite challenging at times. Furthermore, the working culture here is completely different than my previous workplace. Students are ok in general although there are bound to be problematic ones in each class.
When I think about my job now, I sometimes giggle to myself in that a sarcastic goofball such as myself is doing my part to corrupt shape the minds of the leaders of tomorrow.
I have been told I’m quite the hard-ass. Allow me to illustrate.
During one of my first class, I set some rules.
“I only ask that all of you follow these simple rules. One, when I talk, you breathe. Why? Because if I’m talking and you’re talking at the same time that means you’re not listening to what I’m saying. When you don’t listen to what I say, you’re not following the lesson, therefore you miss out on some important points. So I strongly recommend that why I talk, all you do is JUST breathe. (At this point, students are all wide-eyed probably thinking “Oh shit, we’re going to die.”)
“Two, do not be late for class. Before I proceed, does anyone want to inform me of some strange disease of not being able to wake up at a time earlier than 11am?
“Three, I will email you notes prior to class (since there is a lack of teaching tools e.g projector & laptop). All I ask is you read the notes prior and bring them to class. Can you do that? (Students start nodding). If you do not have notes with you during lectures, I suggest you run back to your dorms and get them because I will most likely not let you enter the hall. Unless you want to take a risk and try it anyway? *smirk*”
Needless to say I was being a complete smartass. Whether or not the students got it is another matter. I remember seeing some giggling at the back while some looked completely terrified. Trust me, I’m not at all that mean in class. I try to make it as interesting as possible.
I am teaching (lecturing?) 3 subjects; Politics, Public Relations and Southeast Asia Affairs. Not too boring thankfully.
Okay, I think I’ve rambled enough for now. Going to pack my things and go home.
HELLO WEEKEND!
Turd for thought
August 27, 2010
So I’m sure everyone heard about Indonesian group Bendera’s demonstration at the Malaysian Embassy in Jakarta a couple days ago.
Now aside from it being such a primitive uncivilized form of demonstration on the group’s part, am I the only one who finds the humor that these people actually went to THAT extent to show insult to Malaysia?
When I first heard of the story yesterday morning, the first thing that I asked myself was “Did they all decide to poop in bags and bring it with them for the demonstration? Or did someone had an urge to do number 2 during the demonstration, hence it was just by chance they HAPPEN to have shit in hand (literally)?”
And then another thought crossed my mind. When I saw the news it wasn’t just one person flinging crap and smearing it, it was a FEW people. So the thing that crossed my mind was “Was it their own shit? Or was it somebody else’s?”
Because what a coincidence it would be that 3 Bendera people (that were also arrested) had the urge to take a dump during the demonstration.
Seriously, I wouldn’t even look at my poop after I’m done on the toilet, what more to say holding it in my BARE hands and smearing it across any surface.
And while I’m on this point, why the fark would I want to grab a wad of someone else’s shit???
This group calls themselves Benteng Demokrasi Rakyat, yet they use such primitive ways to show discontent. Democracy? Huh? More like Demo-shitty, as in a shitty demonstration (literally).
Okay, perhaps these people were very passionate about what they were fighting for and in the heat of the (fart) moment , they decided to chuck some chocolate cake around.
I guess that makes sense….NOT.
So here’s a turd..ummm food for thought.
The next time you’re not happy about something, fling some butt nuggets around.
Thank you for your attention.
-The End-
Sorta kinda back
March 9, 2010
Apologies for lack of update but I really can’t be arsed to post anything after a long day at work. 😛
Anyway, this is just a quick note to say: I’M HEADING TO BANGKOK!
Will be leaving for KL tomorrow night, and take the first flight out to Bangkok on Thai Airways the next day (Wednesday). After a day at Bangkok, I’ll be heading towards Pattaya.
After 4 years, I’m going to be back in both cities again. Feels surreal somehow.
The best part about all of it is that it’s all FREE, courtesy of LG Electronics. 😀
Yes, that means IÂ am covering an event for LG in Bangkok. IÂ think it’s a new product launch or something like that. Regardless, I don’t think I am able to release any more details even if I did know what it was all about. :PÂ
I’ll be back in Kuching on the midnight Saturday, of which I am glad to be getting Sunday and Monday as my replacement off days. Then I go back to work on Tuesday and once again get my off days on Wednesday and Thursday. I like how well that all works out. 😀
Will try to update more frequently and thanks to the two or three readers that constantly come back to check. You know who you are! 🙂
P/S: I love you Robbie 😡
*Insert title*
February 4, 2010
I’ve been busy with work and there are many times I wanna blog but after spending the whole day writing, I can’t be arsed to write anything when I get home.
And when I actually get to writing a post, I end up deleting it because it has no substance or just sounds very lame.
I enjoy the writing part of my job and I think now I can say that I’m used to the hours.
Today I finished writing an article that I’m quite proud of. My goal was to write something that will touch the hearts of people who read it. I showed it to Rob and he liked it a lot. He showed it to his mom and she teared up (I was told).
So with that, I emailed it to the ‘boss’ and we shall see if it gets published. I’m not aiming for a front-pager or anything but I just hope that it touches some people. It’s a sad story but in the end a lesson can be learned from it. 🙂
I had my first experience of being a paparazzi of sorts a few days ago. I’m sure many have read about the 14 year-old student who got bashed up in school but 4 strangers in the local newspaper. If you have no idea about it, refer here.
Anyway I was assigned to do a follow up on that story the day the report was published. Trying my luck with another fellow colleague, we drove to the school where the boy was beaten up to see if we could speak to the principal. Little did we know that when we arrived, several other reporters were already there waiting.
In fact, one reporter told me that a couple of them managed to get into the school undetected but was later ‘escorted out’ by security guards and since then security was tight in the front entrance of the school.
So there we were, about 10 of us, waiting outside the school under the drizzling rain for something to happen. Eventually a VIP showed up at the school and we later found out that there was an investigation going on in the school at that very moment we were outside.
It was later learned that the boy and the father was at the school being interviewed by education officers, so we waited and waited until they came out of the school. Upon seeing us, the father sped off in his car. However, we managed to stop the VIP for some information and comments.
Anyway, my report on that is here. There is another story but it’s not in the website so if you’re interested to read up and have the newspaper, look it up on Wednesday’s (Feb 3) edition.
I pretty much rambled on from north to south, east to west so I’m going to end here for now.
Maybe I will update again in another two months.
Hah! Hope not. 😛
Apologies
December 14, 2009
Okay I know I haven’t been updating in over month but work is seriously taking up most of my time.
By the time I get home, am too brain-fried to come up with something creative to write about.
However, I am loving some of the freebies and food tasting I get when I cover events, e.g the opening of The Body Shop at Boulevard. I think it was smart of them to give me freebies considering I got one of my colleagues hooked on the perfume and she is going to buy it.
Heck I am ever so tempted to go get myself a bottle. It is a combination of vanilla and jasmine. Then again I think to myself if I want to spend the money, considering I need to save up for a possible visit from Rob next year. Decisions decisions decisions.
Hmmm perhaps I can justify buying it for myself for Xmas? 😀
By the way, the scent is called “Love etc…”
The Body Shop is also currently having promotions for their Xmas line of which I got freebies too. I got a Merry Berry shower gel, body lotion and soap. It has a fruity smell to it.
I wish I could show pictures but since I started using my digital camera for work, the memory card has contracted a gazillion viruses from the computer at the office (no we do not have up-to-date anti viruses). So I refuse to plug the camera on my laptop because I am not risking it!
Oh yeah, my off days are switched from Mondays to Tuesdays AND Wednesdays now. The office is trying out the 5-work days thing so I get two days off from now on. It’s currently on trial so we still get called back if there are too many functions/events to cover.
Anyway I’m babbling. Will figure out what to blog about tomorrow.